The Life Times

Brendon Ward

valley of the shadow of deathNo one ever said that mental illness and sound-mindedness were complementary. On the contrary, James 1:8 tells us that a double minded man is unstable in all his ways. Is it therefore a surprise to learn that at the age of 16 my first attempted suicide came as I tried to strangle myself? Was I the only one who didn’t realise that self-strangulation is impossible? Did I not realise that as soon as there is unconsciousness through lack of oxygen to the brain that the grip I had around my neck would be released?

Two years into the struggle with depression I was diagnosed with some ambiguous mood swing disorder. I wasn’t medicated but I did sit through several hours worth of counselling which actually made me feel worse about myself and the world in which I lived. I don’t know if this was passed on to me…

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